A Brief Charter of Regard
by Romas1912
Summary: When Sam has a neck affliction, the men of SG-1 offer their help. As they take turns to assist her, some deeply entrenched feelings are roused out of Sam.
1. Chapter 1

**A Brief Charter of**** Regard**

Author's notes: this is set around the middle of Season 9. There are some episode spoilers (of varying degrees) for 4.05 'Divide and Conquer', 5.21 'Meridian', 6.22 'Full Circle', 7.01 'Fallen', 8.07 'Affinity' and 9.15 'Ethon'.

Rating: T (just to be safe)

Thanks: to my writing partner, quinceasmince.

Feedback: all reviews are extremely welcome, and I encourage you to be as constructively critical as you wish. I am always looking for advice on how to improve my writing.

Disclaimer: all Stargate SG-1 characters belong to MGM. I have merely respectfully borrowed these characters for the purposes of exercising creativity. No profit was made in the process.

* * *

Chapter One

On Monday afternoon, Samantha Carter exited an SGC lift with two heat packs pressed firmly against each side of her neck. She had spent her entire weekend in Washington, where she had developed a very sore, stiff neck. She had been hoping to sleep the ailment off the night before, but the soreness had advanced overnight to the point where the whole left side of her neck, down to her shoulder, was painfully stiff. Driving to work in the morning had not only been agonising, but also dangerous when she couldn't turn her head to watch for incoming traffic. Following a few frustrating hours of attempted lab work, Sam had conceded her pride and visited Dr Lam, whose homely advice was to get some rest and to keep the affected areas warm.

As Sam shuffled slowly down the corridor, with her neck locked at an obtuse angle that inclined her head to her right side, creating an awkward gait as she moved, Cameron Mitchell veered past the corner.

"Sam! – hey, I'm gonna round the guys up for a gym session…whoa" – (noticing her situation) – "are you alright? – what happened to you?"

Sam sighed. "My neck's just been a little sore since I flew back from Washington."

"A _little_ sore? No offense, Sam, but it's throwing out your posture completely – you're barely walking in a straight line."

"Don't worry, Cam," she hid a wince. She had been injured by enemy fire many times; she'd never admit to being slowed down by something as simple as an aching neck. "I'll be back to my old self in no time."

"Hey, maybe we could help you out – you know, maybe help you feel a bit better," Cameron suggested as they reached her laboratory.

"It's alright, Cam – Dr Lam said I just needed rest." she used her right hand to open the door, still holding onto the heat pack. Once inside she reached for the light switch, grimacing as she tilted her head. She shifted stiffly to her desk, turning on her laptop and sliding uncomfortably onto the chair, avoiding turning her neck at all costs. Her arms were starting to fall asleep from having to hold the packs in place, and her whole left side felt like it was tied up in excruciating knots.

"I know you're right-handed, but you can't keep using one hand forever," Cameron sighed, hopping to the phone on the wall.

"Who are you calling?"

His next words, spoken into the phone, answered her question. "Yeah, Teal'c; can you find Jackson and then come on over to Carter's lab? Thanks."

Sam groaned, frowning at him. "It's no big deal, Cam – you didn't have to go and drag everybody into this."

"Not buyin' it," he quipped, coming up beside her. "I said we'd help you out, and now I'm going to."

"By what: watching me trying to type single-handedly?"

"No, by letting me work on your neck."

Sam immediately shook her head. She stifled a gasp as sharp pain shot through her neck. "No thanks…I don't need that kind of help. I'm sure I'll manage."

"Oh, come on, am I really that repulsive?" he saw her brows wrinkle. "Don't answer that – just for a few minutes, max, until the others get here?"

Sam rolled her eyes, looking between him and the laptop screen, considering his offer. She had known the moment Dr Lam handed her the packs that she wouldn't be completing any work today. She had been planning on keeping to herself so that people wouldn't consider her a martyr. Cameron's presence had brought out the stubbornness in her, which, she now realised, was the very thing preventing him from leaving. She understood that he was only trying to assist, but she couldn't help feeling smothered. _Maybe this neck pain is taking its toll on me_,she thought. She supposed that his offer was worth a shot.

"Okay, Cam, do your thing," she resignedly closed her laptop.

Cameron scooted until he stood behind her, rubbing his hands together to warm them. "Let me know if anything's the matter, alright?" he shook his fingers to loosen them.

The next moment, Sam felt his hands on her: one at the top of her neck and the other at the base, both touching her lightly. She breathed, telling herself to relax. His fingers moved upon her skin in a disorganised pattern. The higher hand – which Sam guessed to be his left – pressed and rubbed horizontally, never pausing long enough to apply any meaningful pressure against her burning muscles. His right hand worked mostly on her shoulders, kneading into each of them over her shirt and switching sides every couple of seconds. To Sam, his hands felt clammy, leaving her skin damp. She wondered where his thumbs were. His unsynchronised rubbing seemed strange and uncultured, as if neither hand knew of the other's existence. Sam concluded that his hands weren't connected all that well to his wrists; nor were his wrists in alignment with his arms.

At that point she gratefully acknowledged the arrival of Teal'c and Daniel Jackson.

"Good afternoon, Colonel Carter. What appears to be the issue, Colonel Mitchell?" Teal'c politely enquired.

"Hey, guys," Cameron ushered them inside, taking his hands off Sam as previously arranged. "Carter's neck is stiff as hell."

"It's not, really…Cam's just hovering." she was already reapplying the packs.

"I thought I saw you entering the infirmary earlier, Sam," Daniel spoke up in concern. "Is it very bad?"

"Worse than yesterday," she admitted; he always managed to bring out the truth in her.

"Damn; guess I was no help," Cameron mumbled, appearing deflated. "Looks like you overdid it in Washington." here Sam thought she saw Daniel's expression harden.

"Could I be of assistance, Colonel Carter?" Teal'c asked.

Still studying Daniel, Sam acquiesced, privately reasoning that anyone else would be a great improvement on Cameron. Teal'c bowed and approached her. Cameron and Daniel sank into a corner, the former helping himself to a chair and swivelling restlessly in it, the latter leaning against the wall with his hands deep in his pockets.

On first contact, Sam felt her whole neck and shoulder tops being covered. Teal'c's large hands were warm, without being sweaty. He started on her shoulders, kneading the knotted muscles carefully and letting his wrists guide his fingers with conviction. Sam's confidence grew as he focussed his movements upon her neck. His hands felt as flexible as they were large, and on first impression their touch was smooth and comforting. After some minutes, however, Sam noticed a numbness creeping over that area of her skin. Soon she couldn't deduce what was hurting more: whether it was her aching muscles, or the heavy numbness of her skin caused by the strength of Teal'c's firm hands.

Suddenly Teal'c stopped his ministrations. "Colonel Carter, I must apologise. Your skin has become red. I regret that my hands have applied too much pressure on you, and your delicate neck is suffering for it. I am sorry." he stepped aside to join the men.

"It's alright, Teal'c. Thanks anyway," Sam answered. Their aid was well intended, but she was beginning to feel too exposed, and coveted some peace and quiet. Pressing the packs back to her neck, she continued, "look, I'm grateful for your time, guys – I'm sure I'll be able to sleep this off, so you can all go."

Daniel came near her. "Sam, I'm no masseur – you know that –, but at least let me try and earn the thanks that you've just bestowed?"

Sam softened. "I don't want to trouble you,"

"You're no trouble at all," he kindly assured her, and, after receiving from her an awkward, barely discernable nod, positioned himself behind her chair.

Sam waited as he rolled up his sleeves, tuning out the hushed conversation occurring in the background. She wondered if she should risk driving home tonight; she wouldn't have much luck trying to sleep off her condition if she bunked at the SGC. _I_ _could ask one of the guys for a lift_, she speculated, before Daniel's hands touched her.

Sam felt nothing at first, as her skin was still numb from Teal'c's treatment. Once the heaviness lifted, her senses came alive: Daniel's actions, although not as self-assured as the Jaffa's had been, felt steady and reliable. Her eyes fell closed; his fingers, thumbs and wrists combined to work in a fashion that left her breathless. He applied just the correct amount of pressure on her aching muscles, making her forget about the two who had come before. As the knots in her neck began loosening, Sam finally found the relief she had been craving – as well as something more. With the diminishing pain came composure of mind, and the more relaxed she became, the more she noticed the emotions rousing inside of her. Emotions that felt familiar, only she couldn't quite categorise them. They felt fettered and old, entrenched and untested. Sam believed they had something to do with those hands; hands that seemed to read her skin and muscles surprisingly well. Hands that were connected to Daniel: her friend, team-mate, and confidant, who was now attending to her neck and shoulders with such controlled concentration. Sam's emotions swelled along with his unhurried ministrations. Her ailment was expunged from her thoughts as her mind followed his every comforting touch.

_God, Daniel, can I keep you?_

The hands stopped instantly. Sam's eyes flew open. She sprang to her feet just as Daniel retreated from her chair, refusing to look at her.

Sam panicked, realising that she had spoken her thoughts out loud. "– Your hands. I meant, can I keep your _hands_," she stuttered.

"Jackson?" Cameron pressed. "Sam, are you hurt?"

"No…" she reacted sharply. She slowly rotated her neck, feeling agitated and confused. "I'm – I'm actually much better."

Just for a moment, her eyes locked with Daniel's. He was unreadable, yet his gaze scorched her.

"Excellent – Jackson, you should have gone first," Cameron exclaimed obliviously, and Daniel broke away from her. "Glad you're better, Sam – now, us boys are due for the gym."

Teal'c voiced to her his farewell while Cameron hustled them out the door. Sam watched them go with much consternation. She gingerly touched her neck – remarkably, however Daniel had done it, he had dramatically reduced her pain. Even her shoulders had improved; there was only minimal discomfort when she rolled them. Her head was full with questions. What had happened? What had just passed between her and Daniel? _I didn't even get a chance to thank him_, she realised wistfully.

Lost deep in her thoughts, she was startled when the door suddenly opened; it was Daniel. He begged her pardon, avoiding any eye contact, but he had forgotten his coffee cup, and instantly crossed the lab to her desk, hastily grabbed the cup, was again out of the lab, almost before Sam was aware of his being in it.

The door closed once more, leaving Sam to reflect on her distress; or to distress over her reflections. Daniel's demeanour had appeared a mixture of discomfort, embarrassment, and agitation. Sam couldn't ignore the fact that she had done this to him. What had she been feeling when Daniel was massaging her? What did those feelings mean? Why had she felt them? She didn't understand how they had burst forth. The look they had exchanged – had _his_ look meant that he had felt something, too?

Sam despaired; she would never find out the meaning behind his heated gaze. She could never relive that moment. It had been unsustainable; and now it was lost, perhaps forever.

* * *

To be continued…


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter Two

Over the course of the next three days, Sam slowly came to terms with the events that had transpired in her lab. With the alleviation of her neck pain she had been able to acquire some quality sleep, and for this she was rewarded with a refreshed mind.

The emotions that had confronted her were not new. They had always been present, buried deep within her, and Daniel's touch had inadvertently unearthed them. Years ago it had dawned on her that she was harbouring feelings for him, but was forced to ignore them out of necessity. Their timing and situation had never seemed right. His death following Kelowna had shattered her heart: she had waited too long; left things too late. From that point on she decided never to investigate those feelings again, and over time this behaviour grew into an irrational form of coping.

Unbeknownst to her, those original sentiments that she had forced to lie dormant had evolved. Through the years they had taken their natural course. The feelings, when unleashed upon her on Monday, had progressed to love.

_Yes, I love him_, Sam asserted. This was the only natural explanation for the way she had reacted back in her lab. Love: for the man who had cared for her so much, without asking for anything in return. If she were completely honest with herself, there were other instances where she had acted less than rationally. Only now could she freely admit that the reason she never spoke to him about Pete's proposal was because she had feared that her true sentiments would be revealed. Only now did she fully comprehend her motive for telling the descended Daniel that they had only been good friends: it was easier to lie to him when he thought of her as a complete stranger.

These enlightenments forced her into action. She couldn't keep lying to herself. She couldn't keep lying to _him_. That single prerogative was why she was currently parked opposite Daniel's apartment.

Sam reached for the door, but was suddenly anxious. It was one thing to acknowledge the truth, but another to be acting rashly upon it. She had simply left work, entered her car, and instinct had supplied the rest. She chewed her lip. She heard thunder, and wandered whether it was a metaphor of things to come. What if Daniel didn't believe her? What if he didn't return her feelings? She felt a great inclination to drive away. One side of her should not always be so much wiser than the other side, or always suspecting the other of being worse than it was. She would leave.

Sam twisted the ignition. Nothing happened. She tried again; the engine coughed, but the car didn't start.

"Damn it," she frowned at the healthy petrol gauge, before stepping out of the car to investigate the engine. Without the moon it was a dark night, and Sam silently admonished herself for not having her flashlight on her.

There was another bout of thunder, and almost simultaneously it began to rain.

"Damn," she cried.

"Sam?"

"Daniel!" she spotted him standing outside with his porch light on. "Do you have a flashlight?"

"What?"

She slammed the bonnet shut. "Do you have a flashlight?" she yelled, running across the street over to him. "I could really use one!"

"I, ah, heard you the first time,"

"What?" she demanded.

"I had to get you out of the rain," Daniel explained sheepishly, shrugging.

"Look, if you'll just lend me a torch, then I can go and fix my car – then I can leave" –

"Sam, it's pouring down out there," he remarked. "Your car will still be there if you wait a little while."

Sam paused, looking over at her car. The vehicle, along with the rest of the street, was being pelted by the rain. Even if she utilised an umbrella while she worked, she knew it would be impossible to keep the engine dry.

"Come wait inside – do you need a towel?"

"No, thanks, I'm only a little damp…" she trailed off, weighing up her options. She could neither stay, nor leave. At the one extreme she felt like sitting Daniel down and letting everything off her chest, regardless of whether he felt the same way about her; at the other she wanted to run away into the darkness, back to the familiar suppression she knew so well.

"Um, Sam, if you're really desperate to go, I can call you a cab," he offered.

"That's not necessary, Daniel," she spoke firmly, following him inside. She needed to take this chance.

He shut the door behind her. "Did you want some coffee?"

"Just water will do, thanks," she peeled off her jacket, surveying the room. "I'm not planning on being awake all night."

"There's a thunderstorm outside, and Sam only wants some water?" Daniel chuckled.

"Well, hand me a glass and I can collect it myself," she lightly retorted.

"That would be cruel of me," he gave her the drink.

Silence fell upon the room. Outside, the tempest howled. Sam's chest felt constricted with anxiousness as she drank. Where was she to begin? How was she to broach the subject?

She noticed the papers strewn on the sitting room table, "I hope I didn't interrupt your work."

"Hardly," Daniel observed her thoughtfully. "I suppose I was much more interested in trying to figure out why you were parked outside my house for twenty minutes."

"I was trying to decide – whether or not to come in,"

"And…did you make the right choice?"

Sam blinked at the layered question. "I'm not sure…I don't have an answer yet."

Daniel watched her, waiting for her to elaborate. She put the cup down and glanced away to collect her thoughts.

"Daniel," she quietly tried again, "I came to th" –

She was cut off by a crackle of lightning that plunged the apartment into darkness.

"Okay – that's not good," Daniel commented.

Sam heard his footsteps rustling on the carpet. Moments later there was a loud thump.

"Daniel?" her military training kicked in. "Are you hurt?"

"I'm – fine," he grunted back.

"Just stay put; I'll find you," she raised her arms in front of her, carefully stepping forward through the pitch black. Her left hand met with a wall. She slowly followed it with her body, inching along, until her other hand suddenly touched flesh.

"Sam,"

She grasped at him. "Daniel, I've got you. Now, do you have a torch somewhere?"

"I've only got candles,"

"Right – and where do you keep them?"

"In the kitchen: top cabinet,"

"Do you think we're near the kitchen?"

"We should be; that's where I was heading,"

Sam quickly assessed the situation. "Stay close to me, and use your right hand as a guide," she instructed, gripping him. "We'll find those candles."

Moving as one, they steadily felt their way around the darkness, going from corner to corner, covering each wall, and stopping to amend their direction whenever they were met with a piece of furniture.

"We're definitely in my kitchen," Daniel soon confirmed.

"You mentioned the top cabinet?"

"Yes; search above your head,"

They touched around, waving about. Sam heard a door creak open.

"Found them, Sam," he announced. "Though I'll need two hands to light them,"

She gently let go of him. "Be careful,"

Half a minute later, warm light flickered amidst the darkness. Sam squinted as she adjusted to the bright orange flame. Soon they had four candles alight.

"Back to the sitting room?" he asked, lifting two candleholders.

Sam nodded. She took up the remaining ones, her mind racing. The rush of adrenaline had led her to temporarily forget why she was really here. Action was simple; it was second nature to her. Emotions were much more complex. While she was gathering her thoughts, Daniel had placed his candles on the table adjoining the sofas.

"Thanks, Sam, have a seat." he then took her candles, putting one by the piano, and the other next to a vase just before the hall juncture.

"Some storm," he muttered, sitting down to rest.

Sam studied him through the flames. He looked languid, but not unapproachable. She was well aware that it was now or never.

"Daniel, before the power outage…" she cleared her throat; once again the conversation dynamics had changed. "I wanted to thank you for helping me on Monday."

"You're welcome," he said wryly.

She took a deep breath. "It's more than that – you made me realise something; something very important." the adrenaline from before was giving her courage some liberty, even as his intense stare penetrated her. "I'm in love with you, Daniel. I've felt this way for many years, and I'm sorry that I've left it so late to tell you" –

"Sam, please," he interjected, ripping his eyes from her. "I think you're mistaken – I think you mean _Jack_."

Sam's breath hitched in her throat. She was so surprised she couldn't speak.

Daniel interpreted her silence as vindication. He looked incredibly downcast. "Sam, I know you, and I know Jack…ever since that armband mission, it's always been the regulations that have been in your way."

She gaped. "Daniel, how" –

"For heaven's sake, Sam: you just spent a whole weekend in Washington," he cried, bursting from his seat.

She followed suit, shaking her head vehemently. "For meetings and _paperwork_, Daniel – that's how I got such a stiff neck," seeing him freeze at her tone, she bit back tears and continued, "it was never about the regulations. After the Colonel's (as he was then) admission during the Za'tarc testing, he had unknowingly pushed me into a corner. The two of you were best friends, Daniel, and I couldn't – wouldn't – break that connection."

"Hang on – I'm sorry, but Teal'c told me that" –

"I had to save the Colonel's life, Daniel, and it was the only way that I could make him agree to a retest. It was never about my feelings. Teal'c might have heard my words, but he couldn't hear my heart," she sighed, stepping closer to clasp his hand. "During my retesting – I was thinking of you the whole time."

Daniel stared at her hand, before gingerly gazing up to meet her eyes. He was the picture of a lost man. Sam was distraught for unloading so much on him. Just as she opened her mouth to apologise, he kissed her.

Time stopped for Sam. Her heart swelled. His kiss was warm, soft, welcoming; her lips were kneaded tenderly. Nothing was said, yet the kissed said it all. It felt so new, but it felt so right. She blushed when he pulled away, feeling strangely exposed; a something between delight and misery.

"Sam…" his face was red, although his expression was gentle. "You – I…I'm not making any sense, am I?"

"The kiss made sense," she whispered.

He dipped his head shyly. "I can't seem to find the right words – I need to explain myself –," he thought out loud. "After I descended, when I was regaining my memories...it became apparent to me that something was being left out – but I couldn't place it, because I didn't know what it was in the first place. Later on, I learned that Oma had kept from me what I had once felt about you."

"Why did she do that?"

"Because I needed to learn the truth for myself…when I thought I'd lost you on the Prometheus, Sam, _that_ was when I knew – it was when everything came back. I realised that I loved you," he caressed her arm soothingly. "Oma was right; it was only _then_ that I found what I'd once felt _before_. I just couldn't find a proper way to tell you, and then Monday happened…"

"God, Daniel – I can't believe I took this long," she lamented, hugging him.

"The regret's mutual, believe me," he kissed her hair and enveloped her securely in his arms.

Sam never wanted to let go. Daniel's embrace felt like home to her. They stood as one, feeling each other's pounding hearts.

Some time later, Daniel murmured, "The rain's stopped,"

She merely nodded into his shoulder and pulled him closer.

"Sam…your car?"

She looked up at that. "I'll fix it in the morning,"

Daniel's expression turned serious. "Sam, I'd love for you to stay, but morally speaking, I don't think it's right for me to be taking you to bed before we've even had a first date."

Sam paused to consider his words, before breaking into a smile. "Oh, I don't know – this seems rather like a first date to me," noticing his quizzical look, she turned around to gesticulate. "You see: here are candles, a piano, the man I'm in love with…"

She trailed off when he stroked her cheek. Their eyes locked: blue upon blue. She felt his gaze pierce her soul. She knew that their past was written; now she needed to discover their future.

Her hopes were confirmed when Daniel reached for her hand. He softly rubbed her palm.

"Sam," he whispered, his tone heavy with meaning, "may I keep your hands?"

She nodded, her spirits soaring. "Yes – you can keep all of me," she promised, pressing his hand to her heart.

They leaned in for another kiss, and Sam never looked back.

* * *

THE END


End file.
